Расслабься, я пришёл не за тобой, а за червяком на твоём крючке.
A husband goes out to spend his day off fishing. He comes home in the
evening and shows his wife all the fish he caught.
The wife says, “Don't brag, the neighbor saw you in the fish store.”
The husband replies, “That just shows how many fish I caught! I caught
so many that I had to sell some to the fish store.”
※brag 自慢する - хвастаться
A wife was complaining to her fisherman husband.
“Why is it that you never take me out to dinner the way you used to
before we got married? We used to go out dancing, to the movies and
restaurants. Now we just sit at home watching TV.”
“There'd be no point. You don't go on feeding bait to a fish after
you've caught it.”
※no point 意味がない - нет смысла
※bait 餌 - наживка
The zoo owner told the new keeper: “You idiot! You left the door
of the lion's cage open all night.”
“What's the problem?” said the keeper.“Who's going to steal a lion?”
※keeper 飼育員 - сторож
“Say!” yelled the farmer, who owned a pond. “Don't you see that
sign? It says, No Fishing Here.”
“I sure do,”said the disappointed fisherman. “The fellow that
printed that sign really knew what he was talking about.”
Q: When is it bad luck to see a black cat?
A: When you're a mouse.