Салат дня? Это Mezclum, приготовленный из остатков салатов двух предыдущих дней.
There were three restaurants on the same block. One day one of them put up
a sign which said “The Best Restaurant in the City.”
The next day, the largest restaurant on the block put up a larger sign which
said “The Best Restaurant in the World.”
On the third day, the smallest restaurant put up a modest small sign which
said “The Best Restaurant on this Block.”
※block 区域 - квартал
※put up 〜 〜を掲げた - вывесить
※modest 控えめな - скромный
Manager: Why are you late?
Secretary: I had car trouble.
Manager: What's wrong with your car?
Secretary: I was late getting into it.
get into - попасть
A teacher asks her class to name their favorite afternoon snacks.
“Jack,” the teacher calls to the new student at the back of the room,
“What's your favorite afternoon snack?”
“Nuts,” he replies.
“Very good,” the teacher replies.
“What kind of nuts? Peanuts? Pine nuts?”
Jack shakes his head and answers,“Doughnuts.”
※Pine nuts 松の実 - кедровые орехи
Doughnut - пончик
You know you're getting old when you find yourself on the stairs and
you can't remember if you were downstairs going up, or upstairs going down.
You know you're getting old when you get out of the shower and find you're
glad the mirror is all fogged up.
※stairs 階段 - ступеньки
※ (is) fogged up 曇っている - запотело
Q: What kind of button won't undo?
A: A belly button
※undo 外れる、開く - расстегнуть
belly button - пупок